After 2 months of trying my hardest to stay dedicated to schoolwork, it's an interesting experience to have a "break." I still have a lot of work to do this week, but a lot of work with no classes is inevitably easier than a lot of work on top of classes. Today's goal was Constitutional Law. I set out to complete my outline (of the coursework we've covered so far) and the reading assignment for next Monday (the first class after break).
I slept in until 7:15, which I felt guilty about because I've been on a pretty stringent sleep schedule so far this semester. I got ready by 8 and prepared to head out until I realized the library I was going to didn't open until 10. I wrote in my journal (starting Journal #26!) and twiddled my thumbs for awhile before eventually deciding to get a car wash. I drove a half hour downtown to go to my favorite car wash with free vacuums and by the time I finished, the library was open. I studied productively from 10 until 4, allowing only 1 short Twitter and email break. I reached my goal by finishing my outline and Monday's assignment, but I felt guilty leaving. One of our tutors told us we should spend no less than 8 hours a day studying over Fall Break. Well, 6 is clearly less than 8. My guilt led to me studying my completed outline for another half hour, but you can only re-read the same things so many times before it stops being beneficial.
I came home and read 35 pages in my Utah Book Club's October book. (I'm hoping to be able to join them and Ashley on Thursday via Skype for the meeting.) But I'm still feeling guilty like I should be studying something.
Any law school friends experiencing something similar this break? Anyone else struggle with irrational feelings of guilt even after you've accomplished goals? I'm not sure how to shake the feeling, and this week isn't going to be very enjoyable if I don't get a handle on it soon.
1 comment:
I'm not in law school my dear Brownie, but I can relate. On days I am home if I don't work myself to the bone and make everything look perfect I go to bed feeling like I failed. Doesn't matter how much I really did.
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