Growing Pains

ksl.com - Woman killed in rollover accident

I don't think of girls my age as "women," but we are.

I don't know anyone close to me that has died, but I will.

I don't know how to express love and concern for a family of a girl I knew 10 years ago, but I want to.

I don't want to get older, when it's even more common to hear that a former classmate has passed on, but it's happening.

I don't know what to say when my best friend calls, heartbroken over the news, but I try.

I don't feel right saying I'm in mourning when I haven't seen someone for at least 6 years, but it's true.


I remember Chelsie Hill as a nice, smiling girl that was friends with all of my friends. When I think of her, I see her in a class officer polo shirt from our 9th grade year in junior high. I try and recall specific conversations or classes we had together, and I come up short. Her death is so sad. But when I'm being completely honest, it's clear that we were little more than acquaintances.

So why am I so upset? Why have I been on the verge of tears since hearing the news? Why can't I concentrate on any of my work?

She has friends and family feeling this loss so acutely, and I wonder why I feel like this is somehow my loss, too.

Maybe it's textbook empathy. Maybe I'm saddened over the fact that I never knew her better. Maybe it's scary to realize how fragile life is.

Or maybe it comes down to the simple fact that the death of anyone so young, with so much life left to look forward to, is nothing less than tragic.

I don't get it

I received this forward today at work. (I know the text is kind of hard to read; I just took a quick screenshot.)

What I don't understand is 1) How people can be so ignorant as to believe something like this in an email forward. And 2) Why dislike of a political figure's policies or ideologies automatically translates into criticism on all fronts.

In case you're wondering, our beautiful First Lady actually wore the dress seen below:

Hunger Games

My sister and roommate finally convinced me to pick up The Hunger Games. I haven’t read at all since finishing The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo because I’ve been catching up on my Criminal Minds episodes, but today at lunch I finally started. I’m only 60 pages in (so please don’t leave any spoilers in your comments), and I can’t stop thinking of the short story by Shirley Jackson called "The Lottery." Have you read it? I read it in a lit class my sophomore year of college. It made me sick to my stomach at the time, but it’s one assignment from my college studies that I actually remember, so I guess it left an impression. If you’ve read both, do you see a correlation? "The Lottery" was published in 1948. I’d be interested to know if Suzanne Collins has read it. I bet she has.

Excuse me

Last night I was watching an episode of Criminal Minds (surprise) called "Damaged." In it, there is the following interchange:

(discussing Rossi)
Prentiss: He might need our help.
Garcia: He didn't ask anyone for help.
Prentiss: Penelope, Rossi is a guy who color codes his handwritten notes in his notebooks: blue pen for evidentiary items, red pen for supposition and theory. The guy is a fussy, anal-retentive neat-freak who never leaves anything out of its place. (pointing to the mess in Rossi's office) I would say this is a scream for help.

I would never be described as fussy, anal-retentive, or a neat-freak. But, isn't this normal?

That's my monthly report. When I finish a case, I cross it out. That's normal, right? That's how I keep track of where I am in the 60 pages. But apparently, people think the colors are weird. I think they make sense. I can look at this picture and easily tell you the bottom case got set up for tracking. The one above I did nothing with because it was current. The one above that I emailed the Judge's clerk with a question about.

On my work calendar, I see dates circled in different colors. Fuschia: I'm covering the front counter. Purple: I'm covering Protective Orders. Orange: I have the dates scheduled off.

I still identify very strongly with the color blue, because that was my color on our family calendar growing up. When I think of Jen, I see green. Ashley, purple. Jessica, pink.

Are you telling me this isn't normal? And if it's not, I'd love to know--how on earth do people organize without color coding? Weirdos.

Small changes

I don't think I mentioned that at the end of June/beginning of July, Kate and I switched apartments. Same building, only difference is that now our sleep isn't interrupted by midnight apartment-length sprints by our upstairs neighbors (or their child, or their dogs). Well, that's a lie. It's not the only difference, but it is the most important one.

Another difference is that since we're on the top floor by the roof, some of our walls are pitched. It's made decorating interesting. Plus, Kate and I don't spend a lot of time at home. But it seems like any time one of us has a day off work or something, the apartment becomes a little more lively.

Last Monday, I did some Labor Day shopping with my sisters. Every time I'm at Ross I look at their gigantic wall hangings, because I think they're awesome. This time, I came across this:
Kate's an Audrey Hepburn fan (probably because they look like twins). I immediately thought of her, and it was a good price, so I bought it.

Then, on Wednesday I was sick, so it got hung up. Here's the wall from the other side. Sorry for the messy table:

I felt like I needed to add something, and I remembered a corner table I had sitting in the middle of my bedroom. It wasn't being used because corner tables don't fit well into slanting walls. Kate had recently bought a houseplant, and voila:

I'm no master decorator like Jen is, but I like the small changes. It feels warm.

Too harsh?

Okay, so I've been feeling bad. The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo wasn't a bad book. Probably like 4 out of 5 stars. I was just disappointed because of all the raving reviews I'd heard. Hope that makes sense.

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo by Stieg Larsson

My rating: 1 of 5 stars


I don't understand all the hype over this book. I guessed the ending on page 98. I fell asleep reading it until I got past page 200. And it once again got boring in the final ONE HUNDRED pages it took to wrap everything up. It was good, but not nearly as great as everyone has made it out to be.



View all my reviews

Toy dilemma

I really empathized with this blog post that I came across on http://www.the-puppy-dog-place.com/indestructable-dog-toys.html:

"When they're young puppies, you may get away with an average rope or squeaky toy, but beware.... soon you'll be finding disemboweled duckies and shredded rope all over your living room.

Apart from being a nightmare to clean up, this kind of destruction can be dangerous to Fido, who will probably attempt to eat as much of the ruined toy as possible."

I feel like this is all I deal with lately. Zipsie destroyed 4 big stuffed toys this month, two of them being in the last 6 days. And when I say destroy, I mean DESTROY. Stuffing, fur, and squeakers all over the place. My wonderful roommate spent this weekend totally cleaning the apartment, vacuuming the couch, floor, chair. Everything looked pristine...for about four minutes. That's the amount of time it took Zipsie to tear off a rhinoceros's leg and pull the stuffing out.

Now as I mentioned, I really connected with part of that article I included above. But I feel the need to point out that this article was written by the owner of a Rottweiler and an Italian Mastiff. Have you seen my dog? She is neither. She can still fit on my lap. Her teeth don't even hurt when she catches my hand when we're playing.

THIS

DID THIS

"What is this?" you ask? Oh, it's the indestructable chew ring I bought her 24 hours prior to the picture being taken. What's left of it anyway. I'm sure we'll be seeing pink poop for the next few days.

Anyway, I just don't know what toys to give her anymore. And don't suggest more exercise. The rhino leg incident I told you about immediately proceeded a 2 1/2 mile walk.